A Guide To Midwestern Conversation Hardcover Book

 Learn (and love) the language of the landlocked in this bitingly funny illustrated guide to the common phrases and sentiments of the American Heartland, from the author of the McSweeney’s series “A Guide to Midwestern Conversation.”

If you end an evening by slapping your thighs and saying, “Welp, I’ll go ahead and get outta your hair,” then you don’t need this guide, but you sure as heck might like it. Full of common Midwestern phrases (and what they really mean behind the friendly facade), A Guide to Midwestern Conversation is an affectionate, self-deprecating look at the language of a people long defined by their kindness and reduced to their voting patterns. Written by born-and-bred Midwesterner Taylor Kay Phillips, it’s a wink, a hug, and a firm handshake (with eye contact) to the millions of Americans who say soda and pop interchangeably and grew up doing tornado drills in school.

Discover Midwestern conversational staples like:

• How to announce that you hate something beyond comprehension (“I didn’t really care for it”) 
• What counts as “a short drive” (less than eight hours) 
• Sports talk (starts early, doesn’t end till we’re six feet under)
• Describing the ultimate dream home (“It’s got a finished basement”)
• An ode to the Garage Fridge

At Broadway Boutique, we hand pick each style we think our customers will love. It is our goal to keep our customers happy & confident when wearing their Broadway Boutique styles! 

• Items must be UNWORN, UNWASHED, with TAGS STILL ATTACHED to be returned. At this time, we do not offer exchanges for online purchases.
  
  
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  Broadway Boutique
  Attn: Returns
  204 S Broadway St
  Stanley, WI 54768
  
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  Broadway Boutique is not responsible for lost or stolen packages in any account. Once the package is received by USPS/UPS it is the customers responsibility to open an investigation with USPS/UPS with the tracking number. You may do so at your local office or by calling USPS 1 (800) 275-8777 or UPS 1 (800) 742-5877. We unfortunately are not able to open an investigation on the customers behalf.
  
  
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• Any items that do not meet Broadway Boutiques return policy will require a re-shipping fee of $6.95. If we do not receive the re-shipping fee within 7 days, we will donate all items to charity at no refund.
  

• Shoes must be unworn, and placed in original, undamaged shoe box. Shoe boxes must be encased in another box for shipment. $5 deduction for box damage.
  
  

Orders can not be changed, modified, or canceled after check out.

HOLIDAY RETURN POLICY begins on purchases made during Hunter's Widow Weekend & will be eligible for return until the upcoming mid January. Returns will be accepted on full price items with tags attached & gift receipt for store credit only. No exceptions.

Online purchases are processed within 2-3 business days of the order being placed online & shipped Monday thru Friday. Orders placed on the weekend will be processed the next business day. These times may take a longer during busier times of the year. Inventory is subject to change at anytime due to it being from our brick & mortar store front in Stanley, WI. If a style from your order becomes unavailable, you will receive a refund or contacted for replacement if using a promotion to meet its perimeters.